What you waiting, what you waiting, what you waiting for...

Posting: I keep avoiding it. The blog was up for years then down for years when I got pregnant & had my child. I was so excited to get it back up, and I had so much to say, but now I'm like a deer in headlights when I log on.

It's so important for us to share things with each other. By sharing, we can open people up to a side of life or an opinion they've never seen/considered before. Maybe I've been afraid to be that stranger in the supermarket who shares her life story too quickly, but this blog offers me a degree of anonymity. I'm going to start working on some short essays describing my views on life & such. I hope to come up with something interesting. I'll try not to suck. It's time for me to do some real talk, at least for myself.

It's not over tonight, just give me one more chance to make it right...

I keep thinking about posting, but then I never get around to it. Mostly, the problem is that I can't figure out what to say. I have so much to say, really, but when staring down the bright-ass white screen to come up with something clever to say, I choke. I crumble under pressure -- that's nothing new.

I'm up late, as usual, because I have OCD that doesn't let me sleep until I've accomplished an appropriate number of tasks for the day. This number varies from day to day, but often I'm up late because of it. My OCD is a personal blend of guilt, anxiety,  and mental illness. I try to find the humor in it, but some days it just flattens my personality out because of the exhaustion. Not that I'm complaining, just an explanation. I've been told that I'm just quirky enough to qualify as a funny person, but I'm a bit sad today. I think I'll go download some new iTunes. That always cheers me up. Then it's back to work on my writing for a little while. The OCD says so.

...And You Were Just Too Busy Being Fabulous

So the past few months have been kinda hectic. Yesterday  I considered giving up bathing, brushing my teeth, styling my hair (hair is a whole other mushroom cloud issue for me), exercising, and eating regular food in exchance for just not giving a shit anymore. Instead, I put on sweats, bought a Butterfinger and a Diet Coke at the gas station, gave myself permission to have a mini-breakdown, and got over it. Today I'm fully bathed and styled, well sorta, but my fibro is trying to creep up on me. I tried to tell it to fuck off; I really need to be productive. And I'd like to have some fun. 

Don’t Call It A Comeback…

DirtyFlowergirl has returned from her blogging hiatus. It’s been a while. I think blogging became so popular that it kind of sucks now, especially since anyone can blog about anything and everyone seems to be doing so, but I felt the need to grace the universe with my internet presence again. I’m so bloody awesome. Or maybe I’m just bored.

I’ll try not to bore the Hell out of you. If I fail, try reading me while taking shots of Jager. Or just take the shots and don’t read me. Either way.